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Looking after mum

A new baby can put a huge strain on any relationship. Having a new baby in the house is not a learning curve, it's a learning cliff. There's the stress of doing lots of things for the first time, the lack of sleep, her hormone levels changing and her recovery from the physical exertions of labour to deal with. And while you're at it you can put that away and forget about sex for a while too. Just remember that this bit isn't going to last forever and hey, you've got a baby!

Family life

You went into hospital a couple and have come home a family. There's a third person in your relationship now, and that can be hard to get used to. You're going to have to get used to not being her number one priority. Make sure you tell her you understand.

Help, I'm being shut out!

While there's plenty for you to do with your baby, in the first few weeks, she's going to be the main one looking after it. She's not trying to exclude you, she's just doing what needs to be done. Look at it another way - if she's looking after the baby, who's looking after her? Yes, you.

Give her some time

Do you have to go to every home AND away game? Or play golf on Saturday AND Sunday. Or go to the pub every night after work for a few before coming home? Skip a few invitations and be at home to give her some time to do something other than look after Baby - whether that's going out, having a bath or just sleeping. It's OK, the pub's not going anywhere. It'll still be there next time.

Sex

She's just had a baby. And you're so tired you can barely stand. Let's leave that for a while, shall we? Seriously, she won't be having sex for six weeks - at least. Going off sex doesn't mean she has fallen out of love with you, but the mixture of tiredness, hormonal changes in her body after the birth and constant caring for a baby often cause women to lose their sex drive. Tell her you love her. And sometimes give her a cuddle that doesn't have to lead to something more.

Say yes to help

It'll help you both if you accept any and all offers of assistance in the first few weeks. You don't have to do everything yourself. Get help with cleaning, cooking, shopping and the rest of the domestic stuff while you take on the much more important job of looking after your loved ones.

Send to a friend

So he thinks pregnancy’s just for girls? Here’s something to help put him straight.

So he thinks he can relax while she does all the hard work? Help put him straight with some labour do’s and don’ts.

Know someone who’s just crying out for some shut eye? Here’s something to help see him through.

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