Hands off dad
Since our daughter came along I feel like I haven't had a look-in, especially since I went back to work. She doesn't seem to do anything except eat and sleep and as my wife deals with all of that I feel left out and sometimes jealous of their bond, and of how much of my wife's time is taken up. I feel like an outsider in my own family.
While a few new dads might envy the slack you've been given, most would share your need to be more involved. The arrival of a new baby is always going to shift the focus of attention. In your shoes, having returned to work, it's easy to feel squeezed out. When it comes to finding your place, it's a question of making your feelings known without coming across like a baby who's just chucked his toys from the pram. In short, be a grown up about this!
Start by being as up front with your wife as you have with us here. Even if you feel like it's a knock to your pride, she'll rate your honesty. Aim to be positive, and look at ways you can be together more frequently – not just with your daughter but as a couple. It’s very easy to lose sight of each other with all the nappy-changing and sleepless nights, so be sure to set aside some quality time for yourselves.
Rest assured things will settle down. It all comes down to making sure there’s room for everyone in your growing family, including the occasional babysitter.
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